When and where would I ever have a chance to wear diamonds? Besides my wedding ring and Pandora bracelet, all of my jewelry is tucked away in a box in the closet. So then, what does this mommy need to feel pampered? T I M E. Time to myself, time with my husband, time to eat a quiet meal, time to be creative, time to think. Nearly everyday during my pregnancy with D , the moment my husband walked through the door, my first words were "can I take a bath?" It was my 10-15 minutes of relaxation and solitude for the day. The water is so loud that it is nearly impossible to think about anything else. A hot bath is my go to "medicine" whenever I have had a long day, or don't feel well. My husband taking care of the children while I take these few minutes is more romantic than almost anything I can think of. Now, I am not saying a dozen purple roses, or a new coach bag wouldn't win him points every now and again. But when it comes to the day-to-day acts of affection, nothing could be better.
Other than being with my children and family my favorite ways to spend my time include: scrap booking and writing (time to be creative), weekend trips with Jon (time to be someone other than mommy), sitting around a campfire or spending an hour at a spa (time to relax and think), stay- at- home date nights with netflix and take-out (a quiet meal and time with my husband) and finally a nap every now and again completely on my schedule (time for just me).
Before you have children and a household to take care of, your time for the most part is your own. You can sleep in on a Saturday morning and watch movies all day. You can decide last minute to go to dinner and a movie. You can devote as much time to your hobbies as you choose. These things will change as life does. I wouldn't trade the way I spend my days for anything else in the world. However, I have learned quickly to not forget about myself in the process. I am a better wife and mother when I do.
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
The Best Laid Plans . . . will fall apart when you become a parent!
I am a planner. I make lists, pack days before a trip, and think far ahead into the future. I learned quickly after L was born, that even with the best of intentions, plans will change. You become a hostage to their schedule, needs, and moods. During my first pregnancy I had thousands of ideas about how I was going to parent, and the choices I wouldn't budge on. Someone offered me a dishwasher basket for bottles, and I was so nieve I said "I am going to hand wash every bottle." That only lasted a few weeks. I had worked with children and in childcare for so many years, I thought I knew what to expect. MY BABIES were going to be on the perfect schedule right from the start. MY BABIES were never going to watch T.V., it wasn't even going to be on in the house. MY BABIES would be everything all of those crabby babies at daycare were not. WRONG WRONG WRONG! I think the hardest of these realizations came immeditaly when breastfeeding wasn't as "natural" as all the books and nurses made it out to be. I beat myself up for days, weeks even, because my body wouldn't do what everyone thought it was supposed to do. The idea of not being able to give my child the best . . . well it hurt. Not only did I feel like a terrible mother, but in someways the guilt overpowered the feelings you have on those first few wonderful days with your new baby at home.
I still have expectations, hopes, and dreams about how I think this whole child-rearing thing "should" go. But now I am much more relaxed when things don't go as planned. Naps for instance, happen when they happen and I appreciate EVERY moment of them. Bottles are clean, nomatter who or what washes them. The T.V. is on during the day, sometimes a little too often, but I don't beat myself up about it. I sit on the floor and read to my children. I talk and play with them all day. I dance, pretend, and act silly. I cannot feel guilty over the little things. Mommy guilt is overwhleming. EVERY mom has it, but I know in my heart that I am doing the best I can for my children.
* The only pre-mommy rule I have not given up on is . . . NO POP :)
I still have expectations, hopes, and dreams about how I think this whole child-rearing thing "should" go. But now I am much more relaxed when things don't go as planned. Naps for instance, happen when they happen and I appreciate EVERY moment of them. Bottles are clean, nomatter who or what washes them. The T.V. is on during the day, sometimes a little too often, but I don't beat myself up about it. I sit on the floor and read to my children. I talk and play with them all day. I dance, pretend, and act silly. I cannot feel guilty over the little things. Mommy guilt is overwhleming. EVERY mom has it, but I know in my heart that I am doing the best I can for my children.
* The only pre-mommy rule I have not given up on is . . . NO POP :)
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
The Art of the Diaper Bag
Packing the perfect diaper bag is a skill that gets better over time. When you first have a child you either pack up the entire nursery, or leave the really important items at home. I have it down to a science now.
* For major events and holidays, I ALWAYS pack the diaper bag the night before. In the morning rush, getting multiple people ready to go, you will surely forget something. Taking the time at night, after everyone is asleep, will save so much time and frustration.
* I pack based on the amount of time we plan to be gone. Do the math. On average you will change a diaper every 2-3 hours. Then pack one extra. The same rule for bottles, and snacks. The minute you think they will eat completly on schedule, you will offer a bottle that is refused because there is simply too much going on around them.
* Items you think will be "life savers" before your baby is born, will just be in the way when you are digging franticly to find a pacifier. There comes a point when pacifier wipes, fancy snack holders, and a million back up activites will just become obstacles.
* Pack from bottom to top. Put things in the order you assume you will need them. I start with extra clothes on the very bottom. You will rarely use them, but you will appreciate the fact that they are there. Then I stack wipes, diapers, and bibs. When you have to grab a bib fast, you will be thankful not to have to dig to the bottom. On the side you will want bottles, sippy cups(only when going somewhere you know won't have their own. They take up space and will spill nomatter how fantastic you think they are), snacks, and formula (if you use it). Travel formula containers are so much easier away from home than anything else I have tried. With my first child, I used to carry around a baggie full of formula. Not only was it a pain, but I left a trail of white powder every where I went. If traveling with a toddler, keep the toys and activities simple. A small book or two, a little toy that won't mean too much if it gets lost, and the magna-doodle mentioned in my previous post. That is all you will need, if that.
*Don't bring the entire medicine cabinet everywhere you go. Only pack what you would use on a normal day. I highly doubt you will ever be stuck somewhere without a store close by. You will not need lotion, tylenol, or teething gel on a typical day. Again, it will only get in the way.
*Who said diaper bags had to be ugly? I almost never carry an actual diaper bag. I prefer large purses. They are obviously a little easier on the eyes, but also not as bulky as most diaper bags sold in stores.
Some of these ideas might seem a little lazy, but trust me if you are trying to meet the needs of two children while waiting in a doctors office, it will all make sense.
* For major events and holidays, I ALWAYS pack the diaper bag the night before. In the morning rush, getting multiple people ready to go, you will surely forget something. Taking the time at night, after everyone is asleep, will save so much time and frustration.
* I pack based on the amount of time we plan to be gone. Do the math. On average you will change a diaper every 2-3 hours. Then pack one extra. The same rule for bottles, and snacks. The minute you think they will eat completly on schedule, you will offer a bottle that is refused because there is simply too much going on around them.
* Items you think will be "life savers" before your baby is born, will just be in the way when you are digging franticly to find a pacifier. There comes a point when pacifier wipes, fancy snack holders, and a million back up activites will just become obstacles.
* Pack from bottom to top. Put things in the order you assume you will need them. I start with extra clothes on the very bottom. You will rarely use them, but you will appreciate the fact that they are there. Then I stack wipes, diapers, and bibs. When you have to grab a bib fast, you will be thankful not to have to dig to the bottom. On the side you will want bottles, sippy cups(only when going somewhere you know won't have their own. They take up space and will spill nomatter how fantastic you think they are), snacks, and formula (if you use it). Travel formula containers are so much easier away from home than anything else I have tried. With my first child, I used to carry around a baggie full of formula. Not only was it a pain, but I left a trail of white powder every where I went. If traveling with a toddler, keep the toys and activities simple. A small book or two, a little toy that won't mean too much if it gets lost, and the magna-doodle mentioned in my previous post. That is all you will need, if that.
*Don't bring the entire medicine cabinet everywhere you go. Only pack what you would use on a normal day. I highly doubt you will ever be stuck somewhere without a store close by. You will not need lotion, tylenol, or teething gel on a typical day. Again, it will only get in the way.
*Who said diaper bags had to be ugly? I almost never carry an actual diaper bag. I prefer large purses. They are obviously a little easier on the eyes, but also not as bulky as most diaper bags sold in stores.
Some of these ideas might seem a little lazy, but trust me if you are trying to meet the needs of two children while waiting in a doctors office, it will all make sense.
Monday, May 16, 2011
A Few Things EVERY Mom Should Have
Over the past few years I have discovered a few mommy tools that I could not live without.
These are a few of them:
- Battery operated formula mixer. This little thing is amazing. Shaking bottles not only feels like it takes forever when a baby is screaming, but it also makes a mess that you will have to clean up later.
- Old Navy Gauchos. These are the most comfortable pants in the world. They are light, and I don't feel awkward wearing them out of the house. They were the greatest addition to my "mom uniform".
- Aquaphor. Although it feels greasey, it is wonderful.
- "Fancy" potty seat. I couldn't stand any other kind of potty chair I tried. We bought a toilet seat @ home depot that has both a regular size seat, and a smaller seat that pulls down on top of it. So much easier to clean!!
-Instant Netflix. I am telling you this will save your life. No commercials, a bunch of choices, and you don't have to watch the same shows over and over again. Trust me. The older episodes of "Sesame Street" are a million times more entertaining than the new ones.
- A small Magna-Doodle. For church, for the car, for those days when they ask to color every five minutes.
- I have no idea what its actually called but the humidifier shaped like an elephant. It works better than a few we have bought. You can see the moisture entering the air.
These are a few of them:
- Battery operated formula mixer. This little thing is amazing. Shaking bottles not only feels like it takes forever when a baby is screaming, but it also makes a mess that you will have to clean up later.
- Old Navy Gauchos. These are the most comfortable pants in the world. They are light, and I don't feel awkward wearing them out of the house. They were the greatest addition to my "mom uniform".
- Aquaphor. Although it feels greasey, it is wonderful.
- "Fancy" potty seat. I couldn't stand any other kind of potty chair I tried. We bought a toilet seat @ home depot that has both a regular size seat, and a smaller seat that pulls down on top of it. So much easier to clean!!
-Instant Netflix. I am telling you this will save your life. No commercials, a bunch of choices, and you don't have to watch the same shows over and over again. Trust me. The older episodes of "Sesame Street" are a million times more entertaining than the new ones.
- A small Magna-Doodle. For church, for the car, for those days when they ask to color every five minutes.
- I have no idea what its actually called but the humidifier shaped like an elephant. It works better than a few we have bought. You can see the moisture entering the air.
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